Tuesday, July 2, 2019

Yeah baby...yeah!

In 1997, riding off of his success from Saturday Night Live and its subsequent dual rock comedy punch known as "Wayne's World", Mike Myers delivered a movie inspired by late 60s British spy films, better known as "Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery".

I know you've seen it. We've all seen it. It was one of those cultural cinematic "fxxk its" that seemed to arrive out of nowhere during the era of ebbing grunge that brought the aging post punk/baby boomer generations into a glory spiral filled with images and appropriations of an era not that long past. The memory hole is a tough one to get out of, such as Pitfall Harry sucked into the 8 bit tar pit in the infamous, and aptly named, Atari game "Pitfall".

You see what I did there? I brought us all back.

Like a time machine.

An evil time machine?

The Diet Coke of evil perhaps...

Brewmaster Allen and his cryogenic creations

The good folks of 1912 Brewery, most notably owners and brewers Alicia and Allen Conger, both proud military veterans, are such devoted fans of the Austin Powers franchise that they decided to theme their 4th year anniversary after the beloved series.

When they opened their operation, publicly, on July 4th 2015, they did so with a vision to bring a different angle to the growing beer brewing community here in Tucson. Mainly to focus on the effervescent qualities of the difficult to manage sour brews, especially within the Gose variety.

As a usual fan and quaffer of hoppy or citrusy beers, it took me a spell to get developed in to the ideal that 1912 was delving on a higher delivery. But once I gave in and accepted, I was an instant fan. It takes a certain palate and even some form of patience to appreciate the effort it maintains to seethe and develop ales based around fruity aspects, honing past malted wheat that spirals into tart bites and even astringent overtones.

That sounds totally pretentious but...sorry. Its true. Bare with me here.

So when Alicia and Allen invited me to sample their beers for their 4th anniversary, a party set to pop on Saturday July 6th, I was more than willing to leave the nest for a second, giving my Instagraming of our cat Lil Poundcake a break. I totally concurred doctor.

Now to present to you, the reading and drinking public of the Tucson Homeskillet, are the fantastic brews in store for you this summer to commemorate 1912's fourth birthday....by ways of the International Man of Mystery.

This is your bag. Baby.

Fook me?

In the third Austin Powers installment, "Goldmember", we were introduced to a pair of Asian hot to trots going by the names Fook Me and Fook Yu. Get it? Yeah baby. Kinda like Alotta Fagina and Felicity Shagwell, plays off of actual Bond characters such as Pussy Galore and Octopussy, etc etc.

1912's 'Fook Me' is a Gose style flavored with pineapple, orange, lemon, carrots, lemon and lime. Oh man, was it good. The fruity coincidences are all there, collaborating into a foam broth of subtle, yet niche, complexity.

We were, as they enjoy reminding, off to a very groovy start.

Fook Yu!

Since we are pairing off with a grand set of twins, to follow was their 'Fook Yu', a yielding scope melding Asian pear juice the dry hopped with bourbon soaked ginger. Yeah. It was like that.

Imagine a follow up to a twin sister/brother/gender non-specific other/piranha fish lazer fantasy you have been so recklessly harboring (you cheeky monkey!), sort of like a happy ending route equipped by some tart rainbow elite squad lead by bubbly ground squirrels armed with caustic suds bazookas.

Sorta like that. But without the need for clean up on aisle zoo reference.

But better.


Sorry, That Never Happens...I Swear

This option...was a lot of naughty fun. Sort of like watching Skinemax after dealing with some dude speaking Paris talk and stuff down at the video arcade who was hassling you because you don't speak French or whatever. It was cool.

A quote stemming from the craggy British grilled protagonist, apologizing for a uncontrolled bulge during a rather inappropriate setting, "Sorry That Never Happens...I Swear!", is a Gose style beer that has a deep purple (Deep Purple? Groovy baby!) color, flavored with elderberries and blueberries with hints of lime and cinnamon.

A subtly tart sipper that would make any FemBot's head explode.

It is that shagadelic!

Zippy Longstocking

Now lets examine, and drink, ex-zip-it A here.

The "Zippy Longstocking" is a German inspired wheat beer fermented with a wild yeast blend provided by Texas laboratory cultures. Not too sure what that means exactly, but after a few sips all I could say is Zip it! And zip it good!

The flavor profile you get wields banana, citrus, cloves with a hovering notion of vanilla.

This is the kind of 1912 brew you need to be drinking while listening to Burt Bacharach.

Or Foxxy Cleopatra.

Or anything on BBC 1.

Regardless of how you enjoy it, the Zippy Longstocking will definitely get your mojo working.

A Mojito beer? Oh behave!

And speaking of mojo, well...mojito, the 1912 evil geniuses have brought back a fan favorite, "Got My Mojito Back Again", in time for their anniversary and Austin Powers' themed event.

This one will really freak you out because it has all of the elements that an actual mojito cocktail has. Just don't do what I did and slam it down hard. The intense key lime and mint essence there is sound as a pound, a real shindig for your tastebuds, so take your time with this one.

With all of this amazing pussycat swinger fare, it looks as if 1912's celebration on Saturday July 6th is going to be better than...ONE MILLION DOLLARS!

But wait...there's more!

Shhhhhhh...you're not supposed to know about this

The Conger's are going to unveil 2 or 3 new brews exclusive to their 4 Year Anniversary shindig that they are not even mentioning. Yet.

But they said go ahead and just teeeeeease it a little in my blog.

So I am. And here you go. Gonna throw you a friggin' bone.

Fortunate me I had a taster of the beer things to come this weekend and all I can say is:

"Yeah baby!"

See you there.

And thank you Allen, Alicia and everyone at 1912!

You are all so very, very groovy baby. Ow!


Camera, Typing and Oh Behave!
"Metal" Mark Whittaker
4th of July Week, 2019

Metal Influence: 

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